


you and all your vibrant youth

by MxBBadperson



Category: Life Is Strange 2 (Video Game)
Genre: Guilt, Hallucinations, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, Lone Wolf ending, M/M, Underage Substance Use, daniel's a wreck, diazcest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-14
Updated: 2020-01-14
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:47:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22254364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MxBBadperson/pseuds/MxBBadperson
Summary: It's a Thursday and Daniel celebrates.
Relationships: Daniel Diaz/Sean Diaz
Comments: 3
Kudos: 36





	1. understood now the hunger i feel and its name is loneliness

Daniel chugged down the beer. He finished then lifted the bottle up in the air. The people around him cheered. Daniel looked at their faces. They were too many and he couldn't see any of them clearly because of the flashing lights. Behind someone stood Sean. He was frowning. Daniel scowled. He stepped forward and kept walking, breaking through the barrier of people. He staggered to the restroom. The light was dim and it was fucking dirty but he was used to it. Daniel stumbled in and to a toilet. He slammed the door open. He reached the toilet then threw up. He panted. There was somebody standing beside him. He spat. 

'Finally decided to come near me?' Daniel muttered. The pants moved and Sean crouched down. He was still frowning. 'Say something!' Daniel snapped. Sean didn't answer. Didn't even bother opening his mouth. Daniel's face twisted. 'It's my birthday, dickhead! It's my birthday and you don't even have anything to say?!' If it was possible, Sean looked even sadder. 'Fuck you!' Daniel shouted, 'fuck you! You don't get to judge me!' He pressed his hands onto his face and screamed. The tiles under his feet cracked and the flimsy walls around rattled. Daniel kept screaming, shouting every insult and swear he could think off. 

He panted. Sean was still frowning. 'Fine! Fine! Fine! Fine! Fine! Fine! Keep you fucking words!' Daniel spat, 'I fucking want them! They're shit!' He slowly straightened. He stumbled out the restroom and to the bar. Flashing lights and the thumping beat met him but Daniel didn't care for his thumping head. He reached into his pocket and fumbled with his wallet. He managed to get bills out then slammed it down on the counter. The bartender gave him a bottle of vodka and a shot glass. Daniel didn't even look at the shot glass, grabbing the vodka. He opened it. He brought the lip to his lips.


	2. and it's friday night and it's kicking in

Daniel scowled. There was a light on his face. He cracked his eyes open. He quickly shut them with a wince. Fuck. He rolled over and there was a warmth there. He squinted. It was a woman he met last night. He opened his eyes wider to look at her face. Nope, barely remember anything. He got off the bed to search for his clothes but his knees buckled. Daniel caught himself. He waited. He clenched his jaw. His head fucking hurt and he wanted to fucking puke. Daniel pressed his forehead to the floor. He could see boots in the edge of his vision. He looked up. His breath hitched. Sean was haloed by the light. Daniel looked away. 

He breathed in and shakily got to his feet. Sean was still frowning. He was always frowning. Daniel went to search for his clothes. He could feel Sean's eyes on him. 'Stop looking at me,' He muttered. He found his shirt. Did this place have a bathroom? Wherever this was. Daniel closed his eyes. It didn't matter. He wasn't gonna stay here anyway. He continued looking. He found his underwear and pants then jerkily put them on. He found the door too. He opened and stepped into the surprisingly clean hallway. There was railing in front of him, it's dark wood polished and the curving metal clean. Stairs were nearby. Awesome. Daniel went to the stairs, stumbling down them. This place had fancy double doors too? Shit, he'll come back here later. 

The doors opened and men came in. Daniel's shoulders bumped against the man leading the group. The man turned to look at him but Daniel didn't turn around. 'Hey!' a man shouted. Daniel rolled his eyes. Did he fuck someone's girlfriend or sister again? Whatever. Daniel kept going. He knew he should be running but he fucking couldn't. His head still fucking hurt, his stomach twisted itself in knots and the brightness of the sun didn't fucking help. A hand grabbed his shoulder and Daniel turned around with a scowl. 

His hand snapped out and the man and all his friends flew back. Daniel scoffed and turned around. He continued walking. He passed by Sean. Daniel reached for his hand but his fingers went right through. Daniel clenched his jaw and kept walking. Where was he going? He didn't know but wherever, whatever. Sean has followed. Sometimes he was behind him, sometimes beside him, sometimes up ahead. Always following but never saying anything. Sean didn't talk. Sean couldn't talk. Only in dreams, only in fantasies.

A movement caught Daniel's eye. There was guy waving at him under a shadow of a building. It was one of his friends. He recognized this house. Daniel went to them. The person grinned and talked about a stash. Sean was standing next to the guy. Daniel looked at him then at the guy. He agreed. He followed the guy into the building. Maybe this time Sean would talk to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> april 11 on 2024 lands on a thursday!


	3. i know that love is a kind of emptiness

Daniel gagged. He was hunched over the toilet. He wanted to puke but couldn't. There wasn't anything in his stomach. Daniel shut his eyes. The high had went away and now he felt even sicker. He shakily stood up and stepped closer to the wall. He slumped against it then slid down. There were feet in his vision. He looked up. Sean always looked tall. How tall was he really? He'd never know. Sean stepped forward then crouched in front of him. He raised his hand. His hand curled around Daniel's cheek. Daniel leaned into it. If he tried hard enough he could almost feel it. Feel the warmth, the weight of it. 

What did Sean's hoodie feel like? The smell of soap on him, the dust on the bridge of his nose. _Enano._ Daniel's breath hitched. His hand on his, his voice in his ear. What did he know about him? Not much at all. Practically nothing. And he would never know. Daniel whimpered. _Daniel._ His voice. His voice. His voice. Daniel wanted more than anything to hear it again. _I love you, no matter what happens, you hear me?_ And what had that gotten him? Dead in a borrowed car and left to rot in the desert. _I love you._

Daniel cried. He pressed his forehead against floor, hands around the back of his head. He cried. Through the tears he could see that Sean was kneeling, hand outstretched. Daniel laughed. So this was how it was. He had killed him but was still desperate enough to make this. A ghost that haunted him. Daniel cried but he reached for Sean's hand, curling his fingers around it.


	4. you make a fool of death with your beauty

Daniel breathed in. His head hurt. But he couldn't stay here. He set his shoulders against the wall and sluggishly stood up. He limped out of the bathroom. The guy was awake and was saying something. Daniel didn't listen and went out of the door. The sun had set in the hours he was stuck in his own mind. Daniel squinted. The lights were blurs. What time was it? Was any of the food places open? He walked to a place where he knew a food stall would be. Fuck yeah, it's open. He slid onto a stool. He reached into his pocket and bulled out money. He put it on the counter, mumbling an order for food and drink. A woman took the money and minutes later she came back with the food and a bottle of soda. 

Daniel slid the paper plate closer to him. He shoveled all the food down, taking swigs of the soda. He finished the food then ordered another one and another one until he was full. He chugged down the soda and set it down. He burped and the woman laughed. Daniel smirked. He set his elbow on the counter then turned around in his seat. Sean was behind him. The lights were on his face. Daniel's eyes widened. Sean smiling. A small smile but a _smile_. 

Sean shifted. Daniel sat up straighter. Sean was walking to him. He stopped in front of Daniel. Daniel looked up at him, eyes wet with tears. Sean leaned forward and their foreheads met. Daniel sighed, shoulders shagging. He blinked away the tears. He couldn't cry here. Daniel leaned back. The woman was looking at him worriedly. Daniel got off the stool. Maybe it was time to go home. 

He walked away. The trek was slow but it helped clear his mind. It also hurt his feet. Sean looked at him then went to stand by him. 'Fuck this,' Daniel muttered. Sean smiled. 'You in a better mood now?' Daniel snapped. Sean's smile fell. 'Sorry,' Daniel whispered. He went back to walking. He reached the beach, the sand crunching under his shoes. He stopped in front of it. He fell to his knees. Nobody had touched it. Good. Every visit was painful but he couldn't _stop_. He reached out to trace Sean's name with his fingertip.

He flopped onto the sand, arm over his eyes. 'I'm sorry,' Daniel whispered, 'I'm sorry that you had to see me like this. I'm sorry that I'm like this. What would you say?' Not _I love you_ definitely. _No matter what._ He moved his arm away from his eyes. Sean was sitting beside him. Daniel turned his head to look up at him. There was a light in the distance. The sun was starting to rise. Daniel stayed where he was, eyes on Sean. The sunlight on his face. It hurt to see. Everything hurt. Sean looked at Daniel then went lie down next to him. Daniel looked into Sean's eyes. 'I love you,' he said quietly, he licked his lips, 'I know I shouldn't say that after what I did but I do. I love you.'

Sean smiled. 'Don't,' Daniel whispered, 'don't smile at me.' Daniel rolled over to lay his head by Sean's shoulder. 'Happy birthday to me,' he muttered. He shakily sighed. Seventeen. He was a year older than Sean when he died. Sean laid his hand on top of Daniel's. Daniel breathed in then turned his hand palm up. He curled his fingers around Sean's hand. Sean was still smiling. A ghost that he wanted to haunt him. Daniel blinked away the tears. He's already cried enough today. He closed his eyes. It'll be business as usual tomorrow. Or this afternoon. Whatever. 

_Daniel? Dude, come on! Dad's got the cake ready!_

_Not yet! I still have to light the candles! There! Make a wish,_ hijo _!_

Happy birthday! 

_We love you._


End file.
